Friday night conversations #7 To school, or not to school?

I’m putting myself in the line of fire tonight for Friday’s conversation.

I’ve had a few days to settle, and I really wanna know what you think…

Baby girl wasn’t allowed to start school when it resumed on Tuesday… can you guess why?

Well, she has symptoms. Cold symptoms.

Sorry, symptom.

Sure. I get it. Sick kids, cannot go to school with all this coronavirus still so much in the forefront of our lives.

But that’s not the case you see… all she has is a cough.

A post-infectious, non-contagious cough.

She has been under the weather for a while. Because the cold hit her so long ago, like literally months ago, she only still has the remnants of that one, lone, annoying symptom…

The cough. The annoying, cough.

(Cough cough).

The cough that can last FOREVER… but no. She cannot go.

I was soooo cranky. Actually, cranky is not the right word. I was something like, vicious.

I’ve calmed down substantially since then, with a relaxed F$%^ you attitude.

But I wanna know (and don’t let the above throw you off!)…

What do you think? Do you think a child should be allowed to go to school, with a cough, even though it is NON-CONTAGIOUS?

Or do you think all symptoms, any symptoms, catchy-catchy or not, should stay the hell away?

I promise if you respond, I will not bite…

Photo by Oleg Magni on Pexels.com

:):):)

Friday night conversations #6 Do you think it’s time?

As a parent, you either do, or you don’t…

You either think it’s absolutely time that kids go back to school…

Or you think it’s way too early, and really don’t wanna get up to prepare those morning lunches in the cold Autumn-Winter mornings just yet.

Me? Well I honestly didn’t think kids would be going back so soon. I thought this would go on for several more weeks, or at least ’til next term. I was happy to keep baby girl home for a little longer…

BUT, and a big BUT. I am really happy, really super duper happy, to have her going back next week.

She needs it, I need it, hell we ALL need it.

Where do you stand? Too early, or right on time?

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Friday night conversations #5 What will you do first?

Maybe somewhat pre-emptive, what with coronavirus still well and truly on the forefront of our fears, our minds, our lives…

But with restrictions lifting ever so slightly in Melbourne this week, I was thinking:

“When everything is open, where will you go first? What will you do first?”

I’ll go first.

This is all highly dependent on the day, for sure. But I think I will wander over to a café… somewhere.

Anywhere.

Breathe in the caffeine fumes and warm food emanating from the kitchen…

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And relax in the company of people. Hell, maybe even some less than 1.5 metres.

😮😱

What will you do first? Where will you go?

Friday night conversations #4 What’s your favourite season?

A really simple convo starter tonight, but albeit one that all people have a definitive answer to when asked.

As every year passes I find myself appreciating the cyclic benefits of the changing seasons… especially in Melbourne where we feel the drastic elements all too strongly.

Winter with its hibernating instinct, asks us all to look within, take inventory of our lives, reflect and respond, in doing so preparing ourselves for the re-birth of…

Spring. With the promise of new opportunities, ideas bloom and spring forth in our social consciousness just as much as they do in nature, and we are treated to an abundance of promising and exciting new paths to take in our life.

The dry and humid heat of Summer allows us to relax, sit in the sun and soak in the fruits of our labour. We enjoy the days with leisure, and allow it all to boil to the surface… living life in excess, taking life by the reins and RUNNING with it.

And then Autumn. We shed the past, wash away our fears, and step away from our old habits, ridding ourselves of that which does not serve us and preparing ourselves for the self-reflection in the dark and quiet months ahead.

I’ve come to realise that there is beauty in ALL these months… yes, even Winter.

(I’ve even written a big Winter post about it, so you can be sure that will be re-shared fairly soon).

But my personal fave?

Summer. 😁🌞

The leonine that I am… I love to bathe in the sunlight, watching the world go by, taking temporary pause and stock of my life, while simultaneously trying to be amongst every single Jungle event that season. 😂

What is you favourite season, and why?

Which path do you take on the topic?

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Friday night conversations #3 What huge movie haven’t you watched?

The wind is howling outside, it’s bloody cold, so let’s get the ball rolling with this week’s conversation starter!

Everyone has one of these.

There will be a huge, blockbuster, legendary, star-studded, unforgettable, iconic, all-time classic mega movie that everyone around you has watched…

And yet you haven’t seen a peep of it.

I’ll start…

I have NEVER watched… any Star Wars movies.

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ANY of them. EVER EVER EVER.

I know quite a few spoilers from the first movies. I know some big plots.

But the most I have seen of it is via other other forms of entertainment, such as through shows like The Simpsons and Family Guy standing it up.

Your turn!

What big movie haven’t you watched???

 

Friday night conversations #2 Brushing teeth

Tonight’s topic is an either/or that is going to BLOW YOUR MIND.

Even more so, because it’s to do with a simple, everyday occurrence, and yet the discussion of this will have people passionately defending their position.

It is…

In the morning, when do you brush your teeth? Before, or after breakfast?

I’ll just pause for a moment and let you get really defiant about your stance…

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Photo by George Becker on Pexels.com

Ok, so to give some perspective, firstly, I do both, depending on circumstance.

If I get up for work really early, I’ll brush my teeth first, because I end up eating on the drive in or when I get in work.

If it’s a non-work day, I eat, and then brush my teeth afterwards.

Hubbie on the other hand, will brush his teeth FIRST, no matter whether he is working or not!

Dr Oz said on one of his eps (TV doctor) that because of the bacteria that develop while we sleep, it’s actually better to brush our teeth before we eat in the morning.

But before this whole coronavirus hit, when baby girl was going to school, I made sure she always brushed her teeth AFTER eating, because honestly, I’d rather my daughter went to school with minty breath rather than weetbix breath.

Some may argue that you could do both, brush your teeth before and after breakfast… my question to them is: WHO HAS TIME FOR THAT?

(All credit to you if you do).

So, that is us in our household… What do you like to do, and is it the same as what you actually do?

Do you brush before or after?

If I had to choose, I’d still say after breakfast… I like to have my mouth as fresh as possible for as long as possible before my next meal.

Your turn. 🙂

Friday night conversations #1 Red Sonja

With so much time on our hands now, and being physically removed from most of civilisation, I thought it beneficial that we should still connect… we should still talk.

Insert, Friday night conversations.

Let’s have a chat about a different, totally random thing every Friday night. (Totally open to suggestions for each Friday too).

Tonight’s theme… what movie scarred you as a child?”

How the hell did I come up with this topic you might ask? Well on cold and windy nights like tonight, we end up indulging in a movie on telly more often than not… and Hubbie just happens to be thoroughly engaged with Rambo II, right now as we speak…

Every time I say something, he’s like “hold on…”

And I am just holding on to my every thought, like ALL NIGHT.

Seeing Rambo trawl through jungles, get electrocuted, and then shoot automatics in revenge, reminds me of all those 80s movies we watched growing up, along with other chiselled six-pack ab legends like Arnie, and then suddenly…

Red Sonja flashed before me in a horribly bittersweet way.

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Because sure, it was from my childhood and I have great memories growing up… but my Dad had taped it on VHS, off the TV! Yes, back in those days. I was about baby girl’s age, 6 or so, and I saw these horrific things unfold, like a woman being thrown down a well and squashed to death (or that’s how it appeared to me anyway) and though I was petrified I still continued to watch it, over and over and over again.

Why was I allowed to even watch it anyway??? (80s babies!)

I wouldn’t even know what the story is about. All I remember is that Arnold Schwarzenegger was in it, and I didn’t even realise ’til this moment that Brigitte Nielsen was in the starring role.

That is my story. So tell me, what childhood movie scarred you in a really horrible, funny or weird way???

 

I never wanted to use the hyphen (-) for a murdered woman again

I attended La Trobe University in Bundoora.

From the years of 2002 to 2005. A couple of my high school friends went there too, however we were all varied in our fields of study.

One such friend and I, though interests apart, chose a general subject to study that saw us come together once a week.

Anthropology. 2 hours a week in the late evening, we would often drive in and then drive back home, taking turns at the driver’s seat, and then once the 2 hours were up, made our long walk over to ‘one’ of the car parks.

There were A LOT of car parks. Back in those years, there were about 8. You had to walk some distance through the buildings and grounds and amidst tall trees and bushes of varying greenery to get there…

But there was nothing to be scared of. I remember even when daylight savings ended, and our walk to the car park was amidst black night, our biggest concern was whether spiders had already set up their webs, and so we walked hands outstretched hoping to God we wouldn’t feel something unsightly crawling on our skins.

The only time I was attacked there, was in broad daylight. It was while walking to a tutorial when something whizzed past my head so quickly and so close, that it stirred the hair on my head. Damn bird.

They were the lethal ones.

Not people. Never ever did I feel unsafe from people.

Days after the fatal assault on Israeli student Aiia Maasarwe, who was involved with the university on an exchange programme and never made it back to her apartment on Tuesday night, and Melbourne and the rest of the country is still left reeling.

Not necessarily because this has never been done before. More, because it continues to.

The feeling of déjà vu is chilling. Only 7 months earlier, a vigil was planned for Eurydice Dixon, who was raped and murdered in Carlton North. Thousands turned up to the silent protest to stand for a woman who was taken unfairly, and also, again so close to home. But that wasn’t the beginning either.

2012 saw the nation horrified at the sudden disappearance of Brunswick woman Jill Meagher. Even before the #metoo movement sparked a chord, 10,000 people marched Sydney Road in protest that once again, a woman could not walk home 5 minutes without being assaulted, raped and killed.

And not even that is the beginning.

Because the problem isn’t with all men. No, far from it. It is the underlying culture that men grow up in, the “boys will be boys,” under-handed sexism, and superior gender that prevails and dominates our everyday life, that is the REAL problem.

It is also the underlying culture that women have to put up with. The cat calls, leers and unwanted attention. The keeping keys on you at all times. Looking over your shoulder. Going out in pairs.

Calling someone as you walk alone.

This is the very act that Aiia did as she walked home for the last time earlier this week. So fearful was she over the 5 minute walk from her regular number 86 tram stop to her apartment, that she would call her sister. To imagine the fear that she held, subdued from her physical space, existing only in her mind, to turn into a full-blown living horror as her sister heard the phone fall, some voices, and then nothing… I can’t even imagine.

I don’t want to. But I remember walking those grounds. I remember the Uni, and how dark everything was at night. I shudder.

As females we message our friends, partners, and family when we get home. Aiia didn’t get to message anyone that night. Her body was found strewn and badly battered, to the point where police are still keeping a tight lid on the horrific details of that night.

“But she shouldn’t have been alone at night,’ my Dad said yesterday as we were talking about it.

And therein lies the problem.

Not with my Dad. The problem isn’t with all of the men in my life, or your life, or even most of the men around us. Because most of the men don’t go around sexually assaulting and then killing people.

But some men DO go around imposing unwanted advances on girls that are alone.

And some men DO go around letting off jeers and whistles and making filthy remarks when a woman walks by.

And sometimes, its these actions that escalate to stuff of full-blown nightmares.

Sadly, females are contributing to this. I say this with hesitation, because as soon as I told my Dad it was not right that Aiia (and every other woman) wasn’t allowed to walk home safely at night, I added

“But, I would never walk alone, and I would never let baby girl do it either.”

We as women, are adding to the dialogue, by saying it is not safe.

The culture remains, and that is the problem.

We aren’t teaching our boys to not rape.

But we are teaching our girls to not walk at night.

Jill Meagher

Eurydice Dixon

Aiia Maasarwe

PLUS so many more before them. Plus those that are not murdered, but are left with permanent life-time bruises and scars that will horrify their minds for as long as they are alive.

How many more names have to be added to this list before a conscious effort is made to change the way men and women are taught, raised, expected to perform, and excused? How many more hyphens have to appear until repeated sexual offenders, are not put back on the streets to walk amongst everyday people, and given umpteen chances to strike again? (as was the case in the man who murdered Jill Meagher).

You will notice I have not named perpetrators. They are not people. They are inhumane monsters who deserve no name, no voice, no life. Theirs should be taken away, just like those they consciously and with evil effort decided to take.

All that is left now is the memories of those girls, all the could-have beens, should-have beens, and the questions over whether any of this, is leading to change, a conscious effort, anything good, at all.

 

R.I.P Aiia Maasarwe. Unknown-2019.

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Photo by Zoran Kokanovic at Unsplash