Unannounced Cake in a Nanny State

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Photo by Lorene Farrugia on Unsplash

Something unbelievable happened today when we picked up baby girl from kinder. And it was so unexpectedly liberating, innocent and reminiscent of when I grew up as a child, that when I realised what it was, only then did I truly recognise that in this day and age, this was a thing to be noticed.

Baby girl, along with all of the kids in the class, was eating… chocolate cake.

All of them. They were on the floor, cross-legged, some of them asking for spoons so as to not get their fingers dirty (ahem my daughter), smears of brown sponge smeared across their faces, as happy as Larry’s and Lassie’s that it was someone’s birthday.

But more profoundly shocking of the fact they were eating chocolate cake at the end of their kinder session was that…

… wait for it…

The teachers had not informed the parents about it.

(Dum da dum dum!)

And I couldn’t have been happier about it.

I grew up in a time where my Mum was able to bake a whole damn cake and bring it into class, and as the birthday girl I was a God-damn legend. You could hand out lollies, share snacks, and no one batted an eyelid.

I ain’t talking allergies here. No I totally get it if you have some. I had an allergy myself growing up, so I am not putting down the fact that there are some kids that can’t eat certain foods.

I am talking about the fact that we live in a precious nanny state, where every little thing has to be recorded, and every little thing needs asking, permission, and a written personalised autographed hand slip.

For God’s sake.

I have TWO prime examples I came across just in the last year, and I’m only one year young into this whole ‘schooling’ thing too. I came to pick baby girl up one day, and the teacher informed me that she had hurt herself – the poor thing had poled herself climbing down on an A-frame. Ouch. She had been checked out and all appeared fine, but because of this I had to fill out an incident report.

An incident report. I scraped my knee in grade 3 and was sure I could see my bone, there was NO INCIDENT report then.

A second example. A letter taped to the door at kinder last year informed parents that Christmas songs may feature in some of the end of year activities with the children… however if anyone opposed, they would not be included.

Hold up…. WHAT?!?!

Do you see what these two examples represent? A nanny state that is afraid of offending others or getting things so wrong so as to make themselves vulnerable to lawsuit…

Seriously, is this the world we are living in???

When did we start needing permission to eat dessert? To have fun? To sing a freaking Christmas carol???

NO, don’t get me started on Christmas songs. DO NOT touch Christmas festivities. If they don’t let my daughter sing Jingle Bells, I am gonna get violent on their arses.

I can only imagine what lies in store for me for the many decades worth of school years ahead of us, but my hope is that this general wide-spread stupidity dumbs itself down enough so that people stop tip-toeing around each other, and start living with freedom and happiness and trust, so that if anyone DOES want chocolate cake…

They should damn well get it.

Sure, the cake did kinda ruin baby girl’s lunchtime meal… but I was so happy I hadn’t been asked, I didn’t even care.

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Photo by Becca Tarter on Unsplash

 

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Cadbury on Toast?

In the first (and possibly last!) of my solo food product reviews I have had to review this:

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When I first feasted my eyes upon this unbelievable sight on my facebook feed, I had to question whether it was in fact, a joke. Vegemite, and chocolate? You’re kidding me. But in the land of the Aussie, anything is possible here.

I love chocolate (uh, hello!) and I do love vegemite. The correct application of vegemite spread across some freshly hot, straight out of the toaster buttered-bread is H-E-A-V-E-N. Note this is in italics because the angels even sing it. Those yanks who eat vegemite straight out of the jar with a spoon  – puh-lease, you are SO not doing it right. You need a true blue Aussie to show you how it’s eaten correctly (see above) and not some shit-talker just trying to get the maximum facial effect out of you.

But chocolate, and vegemite, together? A reliable friend posted this online, and as soon as I saw it I knew I just had to try.

At the end of a very busy shopping trip last week, a trolley FULL of groceries with an increasingly impatient baby girl chomping on rice cakes in front of me, I headed to Coles (which is one of the places they are stocked, I believe) and searched the entire store before finding them conveniently located near the front registers. A huge sign with a massive arrow should suffice next time, guys. (As if they’re not well acquainted with that oh-so-cheesy ‘finger pointing sign.’)

At home, after baby girl had gone down for her afternoon nap, I fixed myself a tea, and sat down to discover if this unlikely combination was indeed, up to scratch.

What I didn’t realise was there was a caramel addition, and it is this that probably makes the vegemite acceptable in the chocolate. The caramel camouflages the strong vegemite taste that you’re used to, and only after you’ve chewed your way through most of the piece of chocolate do you get the vegemite after-taste, as it kind of very subtly lingers in the back of your throat. It’s interesting, is my best and not so specific verdict of it.

Being a massive fan of salty + sweet (think Reece’s chocolates, and peanut butter cheesecakes, uhhhh drool), I could see how this combination may work. I cannot for the life of me imagine which food invention guru actually came to the insane idea of gelling vegemite and chocolate together though.

The caramel addition is a bit of a cheat. The true way to have vegemite and chocolate, is to literally smear some vegemite atop a block of solid Cadbury’s. That would be harder to swallow, but are you a true blue Aussie or what?

Having said that, the stuff wouldn’t sell. The caramel makes it edible.

So my verdict? I went back for more. And then said I wouldn’t buy anymore. But then went back for more…. and then said I’ve had enough… and now I’m still eating it.

I think I’ll stick to my standard peanut butter and chocolate for contradicting flavour combos, thanks. I will not be buying it again. I’ll have my beautifully toasted butter and vegemite on bread, and on the side have chocolate on its own.

(I have not in any way been sponsored or paid by Cadbury for this review… however with the amount of people who have bought the stuff as a result of my facebook post about the above said venture, I am certainly open to payment. Cadbury, anyone? 🙂 )