A love letter to my unborn baby

I feel you move. I massage the spot.

You push up to meet me, my fingers and your limbs connecting through skin.

I already know so much about you.

Your nightly hiccups, how you stretch about.

Swooshing around me when I sit

Getting excited when I drink magnesium, every single time.

I feel you poking, testing

Knocking at my front door.

I know you’re nearly here.

But we waited for you for 5 years

And those years feel like a lifetime.

You were cautious, waiting, watching

Hanging onto God’s word

What’s a few more days now?

As you stretch into me, push on my muscles, bones, fibres and nerves

Flexing before you greet the world that was always waiting for you,

Darling baby, I want you to know this…

I never gave up on you. Even when I had no idea where to turn, I never lost hope.

Hope was something I would pride myself on, and yet it also killed me.

But still, I held onto the thought of you.

I heard your voice, telling me to hold on, and I wept tears of joy and sadness.

Where were you, and why was it taking so long?

I now know. I now get it.

It was always meant to be this way.

And although it’s all easily said and done now

I accept it all, and I am ready for you.

I can’t wait to see your little fingers and toes.

To feel your head rest against my skin.

To smell your sweet breath and breathe in your newborn skin.

To hear you cry out for me, again and again and again.

To look you in the eye and for you to look right back.

I am ready for this beautiful life with you to begin. Whenever you want.

We are here. Patiently. Waiting. 🙏💞

How it feels when waiting for feedback

What are the feels when you give away your most prized possession?

How are the insides of your body, every second, every minute, every hour, of EVERY SINGLE DAY?

How do you cope, knowing someone is out there, casting a seriously discerning eye over your soul’s work, while you are there…

Alone. Wondering. Waiting.

If you aren’t a writer, here are some other-worldly scenarios that you might be able to relate to.

WAITING FOR FEEDBACK…

It’s like getting to the train station on time, but the train leaves as you reach the platform.

Photo by Fabrizio Verrecchia on Pexels.com

It’s waiting all night for dessert, but then you throw up, and everyone else eats the cake anyway.

It’s giving someone your newborn child… and then they don’t call to tell you how the baby is going. And then they leave the country.

Photo by Ksenia Chernaya on Pexels.com

It’s having your arm hanging out the window of a fast car, flailing about wildly, and the driver won’t slow down no matter how loud you scream.

It’s someone taking the last bite of your favourite meal. Without asking.

Photo by Andrea Piacquadio on Pexels.com

It’s calling someone repeatedly on their phone, but only getting through to their voicemail.

It’s the ellipses (…) being a permanent part of your every day life.

Photo by Karolina Grabowska on Pexels.com

But finally, waiting for feedback is like being in a seemingly unending lockdown that has no definite end date.

Waiting. Just waiting.

Hold on… 🤔

Photo by Felipe Cespedes on Pexels.com

(Inspired by life, but not intended for anyone in my life… I promise 😉 )

Things that shit me… #16

Things that shit me…

People who can’t wait patiently in queue BEHIND ME.

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Photo by davide ragusa on Unsplash

Yeah, you thought I’d been gone a while with my disposition to get revved up the wall by unsuspectingly stupid people. Ohhh, don’t worry, the stupidity is still rife.

And the annoyances are still damn well irritating as hell.

Like today at the Tesselaar Tulip festival. The day was beautiful and the flowers were spectacular as I expected, but one thing that got to me today…

The people who can’t seem to wait their turn in queue.

SEVERAL TIMES I was waiting for something, making an order or waiting to pay for a drink, and then suddenly I would feel something or someone breathing down my neck.

I would turn slightly and see they were practically resting their chin on my shoulder in their extreme impatience to get served.

Like, wait your bloody turn! We are all here trying to get fed/satiated/made happy by the services, just bloody well calm the F down and step away from me!

UGH! Personal space required much? Man these people are shit!